I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
sick fucks of a feather flock together
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
