ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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