does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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