it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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