Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
