Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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