I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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