Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
