im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
