did you get engaged???
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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