whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Randomize
