You're completely useless in the revolution.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
4 words: hood of his car
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Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
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YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.