I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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