Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
