Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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