using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
