i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I will pee on everything he values.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
