birth control should be required to get into college
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
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