Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
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