Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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