You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
