physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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