Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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