I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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