I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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