girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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