Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
