So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
