Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize