More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
These 25 Teachers Said Horrible Things to Their Students
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge