two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
