problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
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