she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize