Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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