So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize