Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize