? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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