I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Someone signed my nipple.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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