Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
is it fun? or sober?
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize