one two three fourrrrnication!
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Randomize
