Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Randomize