He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
