areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Randomize
