Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
