I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.