Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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