This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
