Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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