He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
