dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
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